Tuesday, November 23, 2010

The Calm

I step outside. The sky is grey and lifeless. There is no wind. Trees stand lifeless, leaves surrounding them, remnants of their past glory. I walk. The Seas of people have disappeared, all that remain are trickles, shuffling forward, eyes downcast, or looking to the sky, waiting for the impending storm. A spirit of nervous fear, apprehension, and anticipation seems to permeate the air. I look back. The mountains are shrouded by clouds, suffocated by the thought of what is coming. Yet despite this, there is a calm. A time of preparation, both for those about to experience the storm, and for the storm itself. The Calm is a blessing, we have time to prepare mentally, emotionally, and spiritually for the Storm that lies ahead. Yet the Storm is no doubt still coming, gathering strength. So we hunker down, gather ourselves together, and face what comes. We must prepare while there is a Calm, so that when the Storm comes we will be prepared.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Life comes at ya fast!

39 and 51. Two numbers that as of today are extremely significant. There are currently only 39 days left in the semester, not 39 school days, 39 days, including weekends. That's all that remains of my first semester of College. It's gone by incredibly fast... I can't really describe all the emotions that come with that number 39. It's exciting because it means that school will be over and Christmas break will begin. It's intimidating because that means finals are coming up fast. And it's saddening, because it means that I have only 39 days left with some of the good friends that I've been able to make this semester. It's weird how quickly we can make friends when placed in a situation where we all are in some way forced to rely on each other and to learn to trust one another. I'll miss the new people I've met, my FHE sisters and brothers, as well as those that while I may have known before I've been blessed enough to have the opportunity to get to know better. They've had a profound impact on me, whether they truly understand it or not. I will always be grateful for the friendship, laughs, conversations, and examples they've shown to me this semester. The reason why I have only 39 days left with these individuals is connected with that other number 51, a number that holds even more intense and conflicting emotions. In 51 days I'll be entering the MTC to serve in the Washington D.C. North, Spanish Speaking mission! It's exciting because it means I get to serve a mission, and embark on one of the greatest adventures of my life. It's intimidating because it means I will be charged with seeking out individuals to teach the Gospel and try and bring them to Christ, to change their lives, both her on earth and in the eternities, that's a lot of pressure. It's saddening because it means I have only 51 days left before I won't see my family for two years. I won't get to see my brothers grow in the Priesthood and in the other aspects of their lives; from acting in plays to running in races. I won't get to see my sisters grow as well, whether acting in plays and going to college, or graduating and potentially getting married. I won't get to see my parents for two years, and I'll speak with them only four times during those two years. I will be separated from them by a long distance with no contact beyond emails and letters. I'll be leaving behind the support that I gain from them by their proximity and constant vigilance of my well-being. I'll be leaving friends I've had for the vast majority of my life, brothers that have stood by me throughout our lives. Brothers that I've grown up with, learned with, and bonded with. It's really is sobering. But beyond all that, the excitement, happiness, and joy that will come from serving a mission far outweighs any potential sadness. What greater call, what greater purpose could I have at this time in my life than to serve those who are my brothers and sisters? What greater joy could I have than being an instrument in the hands of the Lord to bring them to Christ, and to Eternal Salvation? So while my life is currently a torrent of conflicting emotions, I have Peace in the realization that this is what I'm supposed to be doing, that while it will be difficult it is also possible, that Christ will always stand by me, and that I am on His errand. So while life does indeed come fast, the Lord always seems to make sure that we'll be provided with ample support to meet the challenges ahead. So here we go, life is going to be one crazy ride!